Chapter 9 - The Question
They met Vanessa at a quiet park.
Neutral ground.
No packed suitcases.
No bedrooms.
No doorways.
Robert remained on a nearby bench while Vanessa and Ethan sat at a picnic table beneath a maple tree.
He could see them.
Not hear every word.
That was deliberate.
Dr. Greene had suggested Ethan be allowed to ask his question without feeling that he had to protect either adult.
Vanessa looked nervous.
Ethan looked serious.
After a minute, he held up the stuffed dinosaur.
Vanessa smiled weakly.
She said something.
Ethan shook his head.
Then he asked.
Robert knew when it happened because Vanessa’s face collapsed.
She covered her mouth.
Ethan stared at the table.
Vanessa leaned forward but did not touch him.
She spoke for a long time.
Then Ethan asked something else.
Vanessa nodded.
Ethan’s shoulders relaxed slightly.
Ten minutes later, he came back.
“How was it?” Robert asked.
“Okay.”
“What did she say?”
Ethan shrugged.
Robert stopped himself from pressing.
“Want ice cream?”
“Yes.”
Of course.
Vanessa approached before they left.
Her eyes were red.
“Thank you.”
Robert nodded.
“What did he ask?”
“You know.”
“Did you answer honestly?”
“Yes.”
“What did you say?”
Vanessa looked toward Ethan.
“I told him I wanted him in our family. And I also told him I acted like I didn’t.”
Robert waited.
“I didn’t say I packed him because I was tired. Or scared. Or pregnant.”
“Why?”
“Because he shouldn’t have to decide whether my reason was good enough.”
That sounded like Dr. Greene.
Robert did not care.
It was still right.
“He asked whether I wished I had met you before Melissa.”
Robert stiffened.
“What did you say?”
“No.”
He was surprised.
Vanessa continued.
“I told him if Melissa hadn’t existed, neither would he. And I don’t want a version of my life without him just because some parts would be easier.”
Robert looked away.
The words hit harder than he expected.
“Then he asked if I love him.”
“And?”
“I told him yes.”
Vanessa paused.
“But I also told him I haven’t loved him very well lately.”
Robert finally looked at her.
“Ethan asked when I’m coming home.”
“What did you say?”
“That you and I are still figuring that out.”
“Good.”
She smiled sadly.
“I wanted to say tomorrow.”
“I know.”
“But I didn’t.”
Progress, perhaps.
Small.
Messy.
Real.
As Robert and Ethan walked toward the parking lot, Vanessa called after them.
“Ethan?”
He turned.
“I’m sorry about your suitcase.”
Ethan looked at her.
“Okay.”
Not I forgive you.
Not it’s fine.
Just okay.
Robert thought that was healthier than anything an adult could have coached.
That night, Ethan slept through without a nightmare.
The first time in two weeks.
Robert remained awake anyway.
At 1:18 a.m., his phone rang.
Rachel.
He answered immediately.
“Vanessa?”
“She’s fine.”
“What happened?”
Rachel sounded shaken.
“I found something.”
Robert sat up.
“What?”
“I was cleaning my car.”
“Rachel.”
“There’s an envelope under the passenger seat. Vanessa left it there weeks ago.”
“So?”
“It’s from a family-law attorney.”
Robert went still.
“Divorce?”
“No.”
“Then what?”
“A consultation about stepparent adoption.”
Robert frowned.
“That doesn’t make sense.”
Rachel’s voice softened.
“She wasn’t trying to get rid of Ethan when she first started making plans.”
May you like
Robert stared into the dark.
“She was trying to adopt him.”
